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Coffee Puns to Stir a Funny Talk with Your Kids

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4 March, 2023

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Stories are best shared over coffee—with your friends, family, and kids! Just something about coffee makes you more comfortable talking and more willing to listen. It may be the warmth they give or the shooting chill if you prefer your coffee iced.

Drinking coffee when you start your mornings or even as you try to stay awake, having a hearty lunch is always something to look forward to. This perfect ambiance can be even better with coffee puns you can share with your kids! 

Blend these coffee puns with your family bonding, and you will surely have a great time!

Coffee, Tea, Something Else Funny

Photo by Chevanon Photography

You can do many words plays with everything related to coffee. From the process it goes through to the different kinds of drinks you can try, these puns will make you long for another sip!

  1. Always have a good and safe time!


I’m about to have a dangerous cup of coffee. Safe tea first, though.

  1. Maybe it needs just a cup of happiness?

What do you call sad coffee? Despresso.

Drinking too much coffee can cause a latte problems.

  1. Here’s to hoping these would work!

How do you discipline a coffee bean? You ground it.

What does the Cat in the Hat use to make his coffee? A purr-colator.

  1. Sharks love water, and they might love coffee too!

    What’s a shark’s favorite coffee shop?… Shark-bucks.
  1. Who knew coffee has been around for such a long time?

How does Moses make his coffee? Hebrews it.

  1. They will need some energy boost with all that flying.

Where do birds go for coffee? On a NESTcafe!

  1. If only we could do something about this.

    The worst thing about being a giraffe is that your coffee gets cold by the time it reaches your belly.
  1. There’s another reason other than having no straw to use.

Why don’t snakes drink coffee? Because it makes them viperactive.

  1. There’s not enough sugar level for this pun!

What did the barista say on Valentine’s Day? Words cannot espresso my love for you.

  1. We’d love to see these live!

    What competition do the best coffee makers try to win? The coffee cup!

A guy walks into a cafe and orders a coffee to go. The coffee gets up and leaves.

  1. Hoping it will not be left alone on the table again!

Why did the coffee call the police? Because it was mugged.

Someone stole my coffee cup from work today. I’m just off down the police station now to look at a few mug shots.

  1. But it still feels as amazing as the first time.

What do you call the feeling that you’ve had this coffee before? Deja-Brew

Photo by Jessica Lewis Creative

  1. This one’s probably the most relatable on this list!

How often do coffee lovers think about coffee? They think about it a latte.

  1. They can’t wait to sink their fangs into it!

What type of coffee do vampires drink? Decoffinated.

  1. Maybe it should try decaf!

Why did the rabbit stop drinking coffee? It made it too jumpy.

  1. On the contrary, maybe they should try a real shot!

Why are cows so sleepy? They only drink De-calf-inated coffee.

  1. This place is what dreams are made of. 


What do you call the first level of a coffee factory? The ground floor.

  1. Do you think they accept gift checks?

What currency can we use to buy coffee in space? Star bucks!

  1. Just a few steps before they stir a lot of conversations for the day.

What’s a barista’s favourite morning mantra? Rise and grind.

  1. Speaking of stirring up…

What did the coffees say before their night out? Let’s stir up some trouble!

  1. One tall order of staying healthy and fit?


What’s a barista’s favourite exercise at the gym? The French press.

  1. Someone was not informed of the dress code. 

Why was the young man who had the job of making coffee in the good cafe fired? Because he came to work wearing a tea-shirt.

Photo by Aphiwat chuangchoem

A Hundred Percent Pun Sweetness 

Aside from funny jokes, coffee puns can also be used as pick-up lines. This word plays will make your kids and the rest of the family smile for the humor and the sweetness, too!

  1. Starting with a casual question is always an excellent way to go.

Hi, how do you brew?

  1. Just a daily reminder.

    You mocha me very happy.
  2. Always thankful for you.

    We’re the perfect blend.
  3. The Barista might have spent some extra time making you. 


You’re brew-ti-ful.

  1. Sometimes words are just not enough. 


It’s hard to espresso my feelings for you.

  1. Here’s something we’ve been meaning to ask.

    Where have you bean all my life?
  1. Catching up with old friends always sounds nice!


It’s been a while. Here’s my number, caramel maybe?

  1. Always a love language. 


I made a pot of coffee, espresso-ly for you.

Frequently Asked Questions on Coffee

What are words related to coffee?

Multiple words can be related to coffee in one way or another. This might be in the coffee-making process, mixture with other blends, or just coffee terms in general. To name a few, we have a cappuccino, decaf, espresso, brew, and tea. 

What do you call a person that loves coffee?

There are multiple ways to refer to a person who loves coffee, depending on the formality of the context. The most common terms used other than coffee lovers are a coffee aficionado or coffeeholic. Recently, they have also been—we mean been—called “javaphile” from the coffee slang “java.”

How do you say good coffee?

If you’ve run out of adjectives to describe your coffee, you can choose from these:

  • Musty
  • Flowery
  • Chocolatey
  • Scorched
  • Delicate
  • Malt-like

Why do I love coffee so much?

Different people have different reasons for being drawn to coffee. The most common reason can be the comforting smell and taste of coffee. Even for kids, coffee gives a feeling of warmth and relief. In cold places, coffee is even more sought-after as the remedy to the freezing breeze. 

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